People in the military don’t know how to drink socially.

People in the military. OK. I have great respect and gratitude for what they have done for me; my civil liberties and my freedom. They put their lives on the line to keep us safe and free from combative overhaul. They are warriors, braver men than I. All that being said, people in the military unfortunately have no fucking clue how to drink alcohol socially. Of course, not all of them, but I have been bartending a long time and I can tell you that nine out of ten of this country’s finest, are trouble in bars.

There are a few reasons as to why this is. The first is their body types. They are healthy, with more muscle than fat. Muscle does not absorb alcohol well… fat does. They aren’t bar rats that have decayed their bodies into drinking engines. Also they aren’t used to drinking, so they don’t know how alcohol affects them. They are generally on leave, looking for women. All these factors mixed with the “Here To Do It!” military mind results in them getting too drunk, too quick. They always want shots, not drinks. They want to start strong but always finish weak. Oh, and one more thing: they’re fucking strong. Yeah, that too. They’re very strong and hard to cut off.

I would hope that the majority of us have never tasted puke on purpose. Save for a few freaks I would hope the only time that you’ve tasted puke was when it was your own, and you were either to drunk or sick to savor the flavor.

Behind the bar however, after this young militant light weight pukes onto the bar splashing bile into your face and mouth, you taste it. You can imagine how bad your own taste imagine being sober and tasting ….. I think I can stop there and let your imagination take over. Yes.

Sweet land of liberty.

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